Gay Roommate Service?

So most of the time when you check out the Google Ads that are on the right side of my page, there's one for Gay Roommate Service. How did that get there? Google usually tries to tailor their ads for their readers. Are most of you guys gay? Actually, they probably think my page is gay. Interesting. I'll have to blog more about sports and all the girls I sleep with. Actually, I only have material to write on sports. Ha.

Righting This Ship

Typically, I like to organize thoughts and create an outline before writing. Not today, today I’m just writing and seeing where this heads. I’m shooting from the hip.

Right now I feel like Bugs Bunny, popping out of the ground and wondering where the hell I am. I’m not where I want to be. For perhaps the first time in my adulthood, I wish my life was different. I’m not happy. I feel as if I have little purpose. Where did I go wrong? I knew I should have taken that left at Albuquerque.

It’s been a messed up year. My father passed. My grandmother passed. I lost my first love. I tore my Achilles tendon. I underwent surgery to repair it two and a half months later. Three months later, I began walking on my own. I developed some really intense allergies and started taking allergy shots. It now looks like the shots compromised my immune system, and I can no longer participate in strenuous exercise. This year has also been a complete failure for me professionally. I’ve hardly made any money at all. And on top of this all, my relationship with God has never been worse. Before my father died, I never considered the idea of being angry with God. Yet five minutes after he passed, I was. I had prayed over a decade that my father would know God. And God had given me a lot of reasons to believe it would happen – different promises in the Bible, experiences with the Holy Spirit, and even multiple dreams of my father worshiping. Why didn’t he give my father a reason to believe? I’m not really angry anymore, just incredibly confused. I don’t think there will ever be answers for some of these questions. God never promised to shield us from messed up years.

I’m not looking for a pity party here. I’m just trying to explain a little on how I arrived in the place I am now. Once again, I realize that I’m not in control here. I look at everything that’s happened to me above, and there wasn’t much I could have done about any of it. No organizing, planning, or outlining could have led me to a much better place. I’ll just continue in the conscious, deliberate, and exhausting efforts to right this ship. I pray about this as well, not nearly as much as I should. Not looking for pity. Definitely not looking for comments. You could pray for me, though. Meanwhile, looking at what is ahead and forgetting what is behind, I will continue on toward the Prize. --drew

Goodbye Kristen, Lily & Claire

I lived with a great family over the last 4 months. They're moving to Florida soon, and I had to say goodbye to the girls tonight. I'm pretty sad about it. They feel like family in lots of ways. Here's a video and a couple pictures of them:

Claire Taking a Bath (Click to see the video. Press pause & wait for the download before playing)

Lily on the Phone















Lily Nursing Her Baby

2131 Cascade Road

My work has become pretty multi-faceted lately. I'm not just a Realtor anymore. I'm an IT specialist at my office 10 hours a week. I'm also a videographer. This is my latest virtual tour. The home featured is listed at $3,600,000.

2131 Cascade Road (Click here to play. You will need to pause the video & wait for it to download before playing.)

Roommate Fun

This is video of my roommates, Lily, and her mom, Kristen. It was laundry day and Lily found that her dad's boxers were good for hiding.

Married

A couple months ago I changed my religious views on Facebook from "I love Jesus!" to "Married". A friend asked what I meant by it. My response was as follows:

You’re curious about my "married” religious views? I guess as I continue my relationship with God, it feels more and more like a marriage. There are good times and bad times, ups and downs, feelings of being in love and times when I don’t feel that way at all. I don’t feel like I’m in love right now. But during this time that sucks, I've come to a better realization that I do love God. I’m not going anywhere. I never made a "till death do us part” vow, but that’s the way it is. It feels like something’s been pushed through my flesh and affixed me to him (Deut. 15:16-17). Isaiah 54:5 says, “For your maker is your husband – the Lord Almighty is his name.” I'm married.

Out of Control

Here's one more for tonight. This one is much more recent.


8/3/2008
I'm lacking in control these days. Despite determined efforts to direct my life in the direction I'd have for the day, I'm feeling pretty weak. It sucks.

I've been doing a lot of swimming these days because of my Achilles reconstruction (5/15/08). When swimming in an open body of water with a strong current, it only makes sense to swim one way if you want to get anywhere. Otherwise, you're kinda swimming in place or else doing some counter-productive swimming, most likely in a direction you don't want to go. The current always pushes.

A few days ago I was praying about some life decisions. At one point, I looked up in a moment of clarity and said, "I'm really not in control of this one. Am I, God?" Moments like that are kinda scary. For the most part, I think God puts the reigns of our lives in our own hands. I've prayed over big decisions before and have oftentimes heard answers like, "It's your life, Drew. Just make a choice." Of course, I've also received answers on the direction I should go. This one was different. I didn't feel like God was telling me anything. I just knew that regardless of what I'd do in the future, regardless of any decision I'd make, I would be completely helpless in the direction I would ultimately take. I can only hope to quickly figure out which way this current is pushing. It's pretty damn strong.